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Three Down, Two to Go? written by Dan

When your wife is pregnant, one thing is certain: give or take, she's going to be pregnant for 40 weeks. For us guys, that affords all sorts of certainty around which you can plan: "Sorry, I can't make the annual fishing trip guys, junior is going to be arriving about that time," or, "Honey, since our little bundle of joy will be arriving [insert date here], we need to have her room painted in the next three weeks.".

With adoption, the conversations are different. You find yourself engaging in lunch time conversations like this.

Co-worker: Say, how's that adoption thing going?

Me (in my head): Adoption thing? Oh by that you mean the blessed arrival of our daughter whom we have been anticipating for the last 2 years?!?

Me (out loud): Well, you know how it goes, could be this fall, could be next spring. With international adoption, you just never know.

Co-worker: Wow, did you try that meat loaf. It's like, the best thing I've eaten at the cafeteria. I mean like, ever. And that's saying something because last week they had this chicken that...

Me: (in my head): I bet if you were a dog, you'd be impossible to walk. Every running squirrel, falling leaf and whiff of whatever it is they smell on fire hydrants would have you running off in a different direction. This is my daughter we're talking about. Focus for a second.

Me: (out loud): Yep, good stuff Bill, darn good stuff.

We've been waiting three months now to find out who our daughter will be. Apparently we have about two more months to go. Or one. Or Six. You just never know. I'm a pretty patient guy, but I'm getting really excited to see her picture, and, more importantly, bring her home.

To the woman who gave birth to her, I can only say may God be with you. I can't imagine having to make that decision. We will love, cherish and protect your daughter. She will sleep in our arms, get smothered in our kisses and want for nothing.

Three months down, two to go. I hope only two.


  1. So nice to hear from Dan! I chuckled at this post because it is so very true. Sadly, most conversations about our adoption are so short and trivial, when in our hearts our adoption is real and deeply felt.

    Hope you see your daughter's face sooner than expected.

  2. Oh Bill! (sigh)
    I'm so so excited for you guys and I can't wait to see pictures too! I hope she's getting smothered with kisses really soon! :)

  3. I'm crying. I should not have read this on the morning I sent my baby boy off to 1st grade.....

    But, before I was crying, I was laughing. I can SO relate to that conversation, Dan. People just do not "get" adoption.

    Two months....that seems so SOON and so CERTAIN compared to China. At least you know you'll have your referral before the end of 2010.....that's awesome compared to us China folks!!! :)

    I can't wait to hear new of your referral and to see her beautiful face too!!!

  4. :( soup for you, come back one year!

    Dan....beautiful thoughts....when you do see that darling blessed face(and may it be sooner than later pretty please!) the uncertainties and agony of the wait will fade. Bringing her home will be second to none and we will all be here cheering your family on, with happy & joyful hearts!

    How was the meatloaf....Really?
    I know you must be crazed...I am crazed and she isn't even my child!
    I CANNOT wait to see her.
    I bet she has your eyes.....Maybe not the same color...but I am almost positive that she will have that devilish little gleem.;)
    Isn't there a song called "the waiting is the hardest part"?
    Maybe we should all post it on our blogs. LOL!
    Don't be too hard on Bill..he can't help it if he's as deep as a coffee cup. ;)

  6. What can I say. I have shallow friends. @ Andrea, the meat loaf sucks. Bill has no sense of smell, and therefore no ability to taste things. It must have been the texture. (ewwww...i almost made myself gag with that one!).

  7. wow....I've been gone from blgging for a bit and I was scrolling down my follwer bar and read the first few lines that came up on your post...and for a minute i thought Rachel was pregnant! LOL or maybe not...On a more serious note.... I know exactly what you're talking about.....had very similar experiences....(probably everyone in the adoption community has)where during a conversation I have a smile on my face and I'm actually screaming at the person in my head!!

    Praying you see that sweet face soon!!!!

    Love and hugs,

  8. This is why I used to run from people in the cafeteria line (you'd think I'd be skinner with all of the running instead of standing in line for food for 2 years-- no such luck). My favorite was when my in-laws would ask, "heard anything from China yet?" I always fantasized about responding, "Yep, they sent us pictures of your first grandchild 3 weeks ago-- we didn't tell you???"

    She'll be here before you know it.... and she'll be worth every minute of the wait times ten.

    (met your wife at the park one day :)


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