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Frustrated. Powerless. Tied hands.

I gotta be honest, this is how I'm feeling about this 'post-referral-hurry-up-and-wait' phase of our adoption. We had hoped to receive our court date last week, but, alas, we are still waiting. We were hoping to travel by Christmas and that is now logistically impossible. We were hoping to have Evangeline examined last week by a third party physician, but despite our attempts to call and email her, we've heard nothing.

I try not to be a whiner, but boy, it is so hard to be here waiting and wondering. I am told "no news is good news" - that this means E is well. And it's only been a month since we received our referral. But this waiting is tough, especially now that we know we won't be traveling in December. When I was holding onto that possibility, it somehow made the waiting more manageable.

As I wait, I have been sewing. I just finished an advent calendar, which is being quilted by the director of Jude's preschool.

And speaking of sewing (sort of) I've mentioned before that organization is not my strong point. In case you thought I was exaggerating, I have proof. I took these photos of my sewing table a few weeks ago when I was working on Indigo's jacket. For some reason, I couldn't find my scissors. Hmmm...

True story about how disorganized that I am. When I was putting together Evangeline's care package, I had some pictures of our family printed at CVS to put in her photo book. When I got home I set the pictures somewhere and (of course) could not remember where. I looked everywhere with no luck, so I got Dan to join in on the fun. We actually went through the trash in case I had accidentally thrown them away. I started going through the trash when Dan said (in all seriousness), "No, let me. I'm a pro at going through the trash."

Um, you are?

So he put on some latex gloves (major loss of street cred there!) and dug through.

Nope, they weren't in there.

Finally, as a last resort, I decided to check the last possible place where I might have put them - with our adoption stuff. You see, doing that would mean I was organized, and remember, I am not organized. As it turns out, that day I was and there they were with all of our adoption paperwork. If I would have been my regular disorganized self and haphazardly thrown them on the table or countertop, I would have found them much sooner.

Lesson learned.


  1. You may be surprised. I know some who received their court date literally 2 weeks before the actual day. You know Abebe does them in batches so some wait forever and some get it real fast.
    I do think you'll travel in January. I know that seems far off now...but what better way to celebrate the beginning of the new year than with the beginning of your family finally together?
    Hugs my friend.

  2. Hey Rachel, I have been missing you and wondering how things were going. I'm so sorry you probably won't be holding you new baby girl before Christmas but it won't be long!! I hope you hear something soon, praying for you all! :)

  3. Rachel, I know exactly how you feel!! We so wanted Samuel hoem for Christmas and there is no way that is going to happen either. It is so hard to wait on a judge. To have no control over any of it. To just wait. We are praying for January now. Hopefully, you, too, will be in January. Know you are not alone. And feel free to whine anytime!! This waiting isn't easy. Kris

  4. ((hugs)) Yeah, this bizness is not for the faint of heart & I wish it didn't have to be so tough....just know I'm thinking about you all and I too believe that when things do begin to move forward, they may do so quickly! I'll be hoping & praying...

    Email me anytime if you need a btdt shoulder....want to help if I can!!

    Sending smiles your way today....

  5. You'll receive your court date and you'll be surprised at how quickly time can pass!

    Love the organization!

  6. One day I came home and found the mail in the fridge. I found my roommate and asked, "Hard day?" Her response, "Yes, how'd you know?" Me, "Wellllll, the mail is in the fridge." Her (crestfallen) "I thought I was holding it together better than that!"

    At least the pictures weren't in the fridge!

  7. mindy - that is hilarious! thank you for sharing that story!

  8. OK..First let me get rid of the mental picture of Dan standing there with rubber gloves wait's back!
    The waiting sucks..plain and simple. Why? Because you are over here and your daughter is over there. And just to give you a head's up...the ONLY thing that makes it better is getting on that plane....sorry I couldn't help you out of this one, BUT I am in the same boat. You would think after 3 of these things..I would be better at it- Uhhhhh No.
    In the words of a great Spaniard, " I hate waiting".
    Name the movie, Dan.
    Glad you found the pics. ;)


  9. Oh Rachel... I know! All the waiting and not knowing was SO hard. Oh, and I LOVE your disorganized sewing table. I gave up my sewing room for Yabbi so I have to actually clean up my projects. It's horrible! Happy Thanksgiving!

  10. Rachel, I know this last leg of the wait is SOOOOOOOO TOUGH!!!! Hang in there. Just keep thinking that your little E will be home for ALL the holidays next year. I am hoping that you hear something definitive soon. Sarah


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